Let’s talk about something that doesn’t get talked about nearly enough: postpartum rage.
Not anxiety. Not sadness. Rage.
Like…throw-the-phone-across-the-room rage. Yelling-at-your-partner-for-blinking-too-loud rage. Feeling like your insides are boiling over rage.
And then—just as suddenly as it flares up—comes the guilt. The shame. The wondering: What is wrong with me?
If any of this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. In fact, you’re part of a growing number of new moms who are saying, “Wait—why did no one tell me this was a thing?”
Postpartum rage is real—and common
While it’s not a separate diagnosis in the DSM or on a postpartum checklist, postpartum rage is a very real emotional experience. And it’s more common than you might think.
In a 2020 study published in Birth, researchers found that postpartum anger was not only common—it was strongly associated with depressive symptoms, unmet expectations in relationships, and a lack of emotional support. In other words: you might not be “crazy”—you might just be exhausted, overstimulated, unsupported, and running on empty.
Why is no one talking about it?
There are a few reasons postpartum rage gets brushed under the rug:
- We expect new moms to be tired, not furious.
- Anger doesn’t fit the picture of what a “good mom” is supposed to look like.
- Many women feel so ashamed of their anger that they hide it—even from themselves.
But anger is a valid emotional response, and it often has something important to tell us. As a therapist, one of my roles is to help clients listen to their rage—not fear it.
What causes postpartum rage?
Here’s the tricky part: postpartum rage isn’t just “one thing.” It’s often a symptom of something deeper—or a perfect storm of multiple factors. Here are some of the most common contributors:
🔄 Hormonal shifts
After giving birth, estrogen and progesterone levels drop dramatically—affecting mood regulation, serotonin levels, and overall emotional stability. It’s not uncommon to feel like you’re on an emotional rollercoaster for weeks (or months) after delivery.
😴 Sleep deprivation
No surprise here. Sleep loss impairs the brain’s ability to regulate emotions. Chronic exhaustion leaves you with a shorter fuse and less capacity to cope with everyday stressors.
🧠 Postpartum depression and anxiety
Anger and irritability are often overlooked symptoms of postpartum depression. If you’re constantly on edge, snapping at loved ones, or feeling emotionally volatile, it might not “just be hormones.” Postpartum anxiety can also fuel feelings of helplessness and frustration, especially when paired with intrusive thoughts or hypervigilance.
💥 Past trauma or PTSD
If your birth was traumatic—or if you have a history of unresolved trauma—rage can be a protective response to feeling triggered, unsafe, or out of control.
🚩 Unmet needs and invisible labor
This is a big one. So many moms feel overwhelmed, overstimulated, and under-supported—but have no space to express it. Rage can emerge when needs (like rest, alone time, help, or emotional support) go unmet for too long.
💔 Relationship strain
Feeling like your partner isn’t showing up? It’s not just “annoying”—it can feel like betrayal. Research shows that poor partner support and low relationship satisfaction are linked with greater emotional distress, including anger.
So…what do you do about postpartum rage?
If you’ve been feeling consumed by anger or guilt about how you’re reacting, you don’t have to keep doing this alone. Rage is a clue, not a character flaw. In therapy, one of the most important things we do is get curious about what your anger is trying to tell you.
Is it pointing to untreated depression or anxiety?
Is your body trying to survive on three hours of broken sleep?
Are your needs for emotional support or autonomy not being met?
When we understand the source, we can make a plan. That might mean therapy, medication, sleep support, boundary-setting, couples work—or just finally being able to say, “Hey, I need help.”
You’re not broken. You’re a mom going through something real.
If you’re feeling angry and ashamed, please know that you’re not alone, and you’re not a bad mom. Rage is often a signal that something in your postpartum world needs attention—not a sign that you’ve failed.
And the good news? With the right support, it really can get better.
Want to learn more or start getting support?
If any of this resonated with you, I recommend checking out Good Moms Have Scary Thoughts by Karen Kleiman. It’s a compassionate, validating resource full of real talk and practical tools for navigating the emotional ups and downs of new motherhood.
And if you’re ready to explore what might be underneath your anger—or just want a safe place to talk—I’d be honored to help. You can schedule a free consultation with by emailing info@hcfvl.com. You don’t have to go through this alone.
Supporting Studies and Resources:
2020 Study on Postpartum Anger and Depression
Title: Postnatal anger: the role of maternal mental health, unmet expectations and social support
Link: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/birt.12476
(from the journal Birth) — referenced in your blog for research credibility
Postpartum Support International (PSI) – Anger, Irritability, and Rage
https://www.postpartum.net/learn-more/postpartum-psychosis/anger-irritability-rage/
(Helpful for readers to explore rage as part of PMADs)
American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) – PMAD Guidelines
https://www.acog.org/clinical/clinical-guidance/committee-opinion/articles/2018/11/screening-for-perinatal-depression
(Use this to emphasize the importance of screening for mood symptoms, including irritability)
Kathryn Tipton, MA, LPC, PMH-C, is a licensed therapist and co-founder of The Houston Center for Valued Living. She specializes in reproductive mental health, insomnia, and anxiety treatment, helping clients navigate life’s hardest moments with clarity, compassion, and evidence-based tools.